Wednesday, September 3, 2008

The one about F.R.I.E.N.D.S. (Part uno)

Main characters:
Pekinja (The Elementalist (F) )
Juile (Brunie Etienne)
Orwell (Scout (M) )

Act one, Scene one: In Bahama swamp.

-Orwell: "aaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAA! they're behind me! they're behind me!" (runs away from about 30 King Snails)
-Juile: "Relax, it's only some snails!" (starts shooting at them)
-Orwell: "did you see the size of them!? They're like Pokemon on friggin' steroids!"
-Pekinja: "Swamp. It had to be swamp. Just today when I decided to put on my new fancy robe."
-Juile: "Oh, the one you bought in reboldeux? the one that was so expensive?"
-Pekinja: "The very same one."
-Orwell: (still trying to run away from those snails) " Girls, girls, girls, FOCUS HERE!"
-Julie: "Quit yer bitchin', and try to form them in a round group." (Still firing mercilessly at the snails.) " Peki your turn. You know what to do."
-Pekinja: " Ah, work work". (starts casting a Volcanic Eruption)
-Orwell :"AAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaa....." (Runs away from the King Snails in a straight line, out of line of sight from the girls.)
(The Ground opens, and the lava burns the snails.)
-Julie: "Looting time!"
-Pekinja :"You go on ahead. I'll just stay on this dry part."
-Julie (stops in mid-water turns around and says): "You just don't wanna get this dress dirty, don't you?"
-Pekinja only gives her a wink-smile ( ;) ). Julie grabs the loot, and comes back to the dry part.
-Pekinja:" Anything good?"
-Julie :" Nope, just the same crap as always. Eretrarium, Ionium, talt...."
-Pekinja :" Wait whats this?"
-Julie (After a careful examination) :" Looks like a skin?"
-Pekinja: "Well where did it come from?"
-Julie :" A snail... I guess."
-Pekinja :" So it's a snailskin."
-Orwell:".....aaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" (Comes on to the dry patch of grass, up to the girls)
-Pekinja :" Relax, they're dead."
-Orwell (out of breath) :" Thank.... god..." (Tries to catch his breath.)
-Julie :"You really need to stop smoking."
-Orwell :" I never smoked".
(Julie has a flashback, she remembers two weeks ago, she saw him carrying a box of cigars somewhere, and he said they're for his grandomther. (She was dead for 6 years.))
-Julie: "Riiight..."
-Orwell opens the inventory (Alt+I) :" Anything good?"
-Pekinja : "no it's the same crap we're getting since level one! (Furiously) We never get anything good!" " So next time you're gonna ask me what did we get, it would still be the stupid minerals!"
-Orwell (Whispers to Julie) :"what's her problem˝?
-Julie :"She got her robe dirty again." (to herself) "snailskin.... now why does that sound familiar?"
-Orwell :" Sweet!" (Pulls out the charred snailskin) "Lunch! Oh I just love french cousine!"
-Pekinja (lies on the grass): "well I'm exhausted."
-Julie (gives Pekinja a doubtful stare) "you didn't do much to be honest.." (walks away from the pair, trying to concentrate where did she hear for the snailskin. She pulls out the quest log book) :" snailskin, snailskin, snailskin. Where did i hear that name before?" (browses trough the questbook)

(none of the girls are avare of the scout eating the snailskin)

-Orwell: "mmm this is tasty." (munches on the charred snailskin) "could use a bit of salt though..."
-Pekinja (to herself, in a quiet voice) :" the snailskins were supposed to be a rare drop. I remember them reaching a market price of 400m Vis." "I think we'd finally hit the jackpot."

(Julie comes back to those two, still browsing though the logbook, then suddenly stops on a page)
-Julie :"Ah, there it is! I knew it. were supposed to get 30 of them for the wicked witch of the swamp, and she would exchange them for a weapon!" "Well finnaly someting usefull."
-Pekinja:" 30?!" " but were here hunting for the last 6 months, and all we got was one of those skins?"
(both girls are still not aware of the not-hungry-anymore-scout)
-Julie:" well atleast we got one." "It's a start.... I guess."
(Opens the inventory (Alt+I) and starts looking for the snailskin) Julie: "Now where did i put it...?"
-Orwell :"Put what?" (Wipes his mouth) " Well now i could use a ferrucio milk." (more to himself than to the girls)
-Julie: " The snailskin." "Just found out, they're like super-uber rare."
-Orwell (makes a O.O face) :" what snailskin...?"
-Julie :" the one we just got."
-Orwell :"uh-oh."
-Julie (still browsing trough the inventory): "what uh-oh?" (looks at Orwell, and sees his O.O face.) "oh no. Don't give me that look. Usually when you say uh-oh, it's a bad uh-oh.""Like the time we went to katovic and you packed only with your swimsuit wear." " what did you do to the snailskin?"
-(Orwell makes a guilty i-didn't-wan't-to-do-that face, similair to when your dog pees on your carpet) :"I kinda eated it." "and to be honest, it' wasn't that much good." "I think the french cousine is way over-rated."
-Julie (Furiously) :"AAAAARRRGGHHHH!!!!!!" (She did say some more "juicy" words, but I'm letting them out.)
-Pekinja (stands up) :" Well that's just dandy!" "CAN WE GO NOW?!?!?!?!"
(Both of the girls are giving Orwell the -.- look)
-Orwell :" aww.. come on now, I didn't mean it!"
(Both girls turn around and start walking back to bahama base camp)
-Orwell:" so you're just gonna leave me here?"
(Both girls are still walking towards the camp, ignoring the Scout)
-Orwell:" come on!" "Atleast says something!" (grabs his belly) "uh-oh." "This aint good." (burps) (to himself) "I think the snailskin is coming back up..."

===================================================================

-Interviewer: "So what do you think about your team?"
-Julie: "well It could be worse.."
-Interviewer:" what do you mean?"
-Julie :"well." those two are a bit 'unique', in their own way that is."
-Interviewer: " and what do you think about Orwell (The Scout)?"
-Julie :"Hmmm. He's very supportive. He's been there everytime I needed him. I think he still has a crush on me."
-Interviewer: "and about Pekinja (The elementalist)?"
-Julie :" oh don't get me started on her!" "She's like one of those dumb-never-grown-up-blonde-princesses-where-looks-ARE-everything!"
-Interviewer: " But she is an elementalist. she had to be smart."
-Julie: " yes. really. " I can't imagine how many people had to nail her, to give her the elementalist license." " and between you and me I know 'they're fake'. "She has a rich daddy. Probably bought her, her boobies too."
-Interviewer: " but she's still smart..." (doubtfully) :"right?"
-Julie: " oh please, when we first met, Orwell asked her ' if those guns are real ' but she only smiled to him, and told him that she doesn't use the guns. She uses bracelets. SHE DIDN'T EVEN GET THE FRIGGIN' JOKE!!!!!"

===================================================================
-Interviewer: " so Pekinja (The elementalist), what do you think about your team"
-Pekinja (She's sitting like a queen on her chair, legs crossed, and she's using her finger to swirl a lock of her beautiful blond hair) :"Oh i think they're nice."
-Interviewer :"so what about Julie (Brunie etienne)?"
-Pekinja :"oh miss-perfect-know-it-all!" "She always has bigger kill count as me!"
-Interviewer :" and What about Orwell (the scout)?"
-Pekinja :" oh, I think he's kinda cute" (smirks)
-Interviewer :"so, how DID you get your elementalist license?" " if you don't mind me asking"
-Pekinja:" oh my daddy bought it for me." he buys a lot of things for me. once as I was little, he bought me a pink pony, and a servant to take care of him, and a servant to ride him" Then he just bought the whole Elementalist school" " and I was home-schooled" But i failed the elementalist exam. so my daddy just bought me the license. "And for some reason all the male elemetnalist teachers were always glad to see me." "but they kept staring at my boobies." Like they were too big." Are they too big?"
Interviewer (has been staring at her boobies for the past 10 minutes) :" I'm sorry what?" " so how did you get her license?"
-Pekinja:"like i said....."

===================================================================
-Interviewer: " Oh come on now. Pekinja's not that dumb. I think she's just sweet."
-Julie (quietly) :" Yeah so sweet she'll give you a fucking cavity."
-Interviewer :" excuse me what?
-Julie "oh nothing, nothing."

===================================================================
-Orwell :" DRAPES! all they ever talk is drapes! and curtains! And pink handkerchiefs!" " they go on and on and on about one colour! Porange! who ever heard of such colour! they said it was a mix of pink and orange, and is supposedly be a hit with the female population! Who gives a crap, if you like it you buy it! you don't make an autobiography about it!
Interviewer :" so how did you end up here? I mean end up with them?"
-Orwell: "I should'ev listen to my mother when she said that I should go as a dentist!" "but noooo, I wanted the thrill and the excitement." " And I ended up in a fashion squad!" "and they never stop talking!" "They really don't get that the more sound they make, the more mobs will come, and the more mobs come, the more must they comment each one!"
-Interviewer:" So what do you think about Julie (Brunie Etienne)?"
-Orwell:" well I still love her, altough we stopped dating."
-Interviewer:" you were dating?"
-Orwell :" Yes, but everything went downhill after she got that 'Outrage shooting stancebook' "
Interviewer:" what do you mean?"
(Orwell has a flashback. 6 months ago while raiding Gerero.
Orwell:" so I was thinking, do you wanna go out on friday?"
Julie:" WHAT?" (Keeps shooting mercilessly at Gerero).
Orwell :"I said DO YOU WANNA..."
Julie Interrupts him :" WHAT? YOU NEED TO SPEAK UP HONEY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU!"
Orwell: " yes I know, the banging is too loud!"
Julie:" I STILL CAN'T HEAR YOU, BECAUSE THE BANGING IS TOO LOUD!!!")
-Orwell: " after 7-8 of those kind of conversations I just gave up."
-Interviewer:" So what do you think about Pekinja (The elementalist)?"
-Orwell :" oh miss perfect. Miss my-daddy-can-buy-your-daddy. But she scares me. She can open the earth and let out lava for one, and Sometimes when we camp out in a map over-night, I turn around in my sleep, and see her turning around quickly too. and I just know she was looking at me. In my sleep, now how creepy is that?"
-Interviewer: " so what do you think about her... khm.. we'll call them 'other features'."
-Orwell: " Oh please everyone knows they're fake."
-Interviewer: "But it's Eye-Candy."
-Orwell:" True dat"
-Interviewer: "Word!"
(They both make fists and hit eachother in the fist. Ghetto style)
-Orwell:" but I just hope she finds a man that can cook, because let's be honest, that Snailskin was waay over-charred. Like she was getting cooking lessons from that Panfilo guy, that can't cook a simple pizza. Best on the new continent my arse! Sometimes when he cooks for us, we just give it to the dog, and then say it was delicious."
(The door opens, and a head in a white cooks hat looks inside the room)
-Panfilo De Navarez: " I HEARD THAT!"









3 comments:

wuming said...

Jinroh here. Where did u go kasu??? Didn't see u much in GE. I now doing my service in my military camp >.<

The G-man (Kasumatra Family) said...

kasu was a victim of a consiracy theory and got sent to jail. now kasu has to hunt for 730x Rat Meats, but he is currently too busy with study/GF/life issues, so he will be joining you guys ASAP:)

wuming said...

LOL, keep in touch man. Hhaha..